I am a 45 year old guy living on the outskirts of Nashville, Tennessee. I have been married to my beautiful Bobbi Leigh for 26 years and we have 3 children—Shelby, age 17; Chloe, age 13; and Jayden, age 5.
You may not be able to tell it here, but our life is a circus!
I have been in healthcare pretty much my entire life, going as far back as 1990 serving as a medic/EMT in the United States Air Force. For the past 16 years, I’ve been a cardiovascular sonographer.
Since 2008, I have owned a cardiovascular ultrasound business that caters to private practice physicians and their patients. Everything was going great until the Affordable Care Act was enacted in 2010. Healthcare reform took its toll on me and my clients. Most of the private practice physicians I served either had to close their doors or sell out to hospitals.
In September 2011, I ended up taking a massive pay cut.
Immediately, our bills were $2,000 more a month than our income. As you can imagine, this rocked our world. Years of financial struggle led to stress, anxiety, weight gain, depression, doubt, fear, and debt. I know my struggles don’t compare to some people’s struggles, but ages 40 to 45 have been the most difficult of my life.
Thankfully, however, I am coming out on the other side. I am finding new peace and joy.
Earlier this year, I turned 45. God only knows how long I will live, but for me, I feel like I’m at the half-way point of my life. I’m half way to 90. I may live beyond that or I may die tomorrow, but it’s a good time to stop and reflect. A good time to re-evaluate where I am, where I’ve been, where I’m going, and what matters most.
After 5 years of struggle and everything I have tried to get ahead not working, I started (again) increasing my devotion to God’s Word.
James 1:2 says “Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”
Romans 5:3 says “…we rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.”
I now believe God has been using this time to mold me into something different. To draw me closer to Him.
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”—Jeremiah 29:11
My plans have not been His plans. I kept trying to veer off the path, trying different things, but they weren’t His will.
“We can make our plans, but the LORD determines our steps.”—Proverbs 16:9
Romans 8:28 says “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose.”—notice it says “according to His purpose”, not “our purpose”.
What I consider the first half of my life, I was living for myself. I don’t want to live for myself anymore. It’s a dead end road. Even people that gain everything the world has to offer still feel like something is missing. Want proof? Check out this video of Tom Brady. He has fame, looks, millions of dollars, a supermodel wife, multiple MVP awards, multiple Super Bowl rings, and yet he still feels like something is missing.
This is a total cliché, but it’s true…the most important things in life are not things.
The reason we feel like something is missing is because we were created by God and He put an innate desire in His creation to know Him. And sadly, lots of people claim to know God, but don’t. Jesus says in Matthew 15:8, “These people honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me.” In Matthew 7:22-23, Jesus said “On judgment day many will say to me, ‘Lord! Lord! We prophesied in your name and cast out demons in your name and performed many miracles in your name.’ But I will reply, ‘I never knew you. Get away from me, you who break God’s laws.”
“What good does it for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul?”—Mark 8:36
Have you ever heard John Ortberg’s “It all goes back in the box”? Even if you have, take 3 minutes to hear it again. It’s worth it…
I have determined, the only way to find true life, real life, authentic life, my purpose in life, is to connect with the Creator and Author of life. There is no other way. God is our source of life. We can achieve many great things in the world, but it is all in vain if it is not for the glory of God and through knowing God and His will for our life.
What about you? Do you ever feel like there has to be something more to life?
If so, join me. Let’s find it together.
Jesus came that we may have life and have it more abundantly.—John 10:10
Jesus said “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.”—John 14:6
And no matter what, we can take peace in this: Jesus said “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”—John 16:33
I love this song and it’s words. This fits me where I am today…